Tag Archives: Seniors and Poverty

Only Child’s health is eating her life -literally

Only child contemplates new health issue

Only child contemplates new health issue

Again with apologizes to Elizabeth Verwey (whose book is titled “My Business Ate My Life”) for my title above. Elizabeth’s book deals with workaholic entrepreneurs. My title refers to my health or lack of good health.

I now have another big health problem, although if all goes well when it is supposed to (hah! hah!) it is temporary. This one is dental, starting with pain and pressure in a lower molar on Sunday. This is the molar the dentist just filled in with a new big filling in February of this year to replace the one he did in 1999 that was falling out.

Definitely not right or fair but not much seems to be right or fair in my life this year. I saw my dentist yesterday afternoon and yes he said I have two options, root canal or have the tooth extracted. The conversation right after went something like this.

Me: :”I would rather kill myself than have a root canal.”

Dentist:”I guess you’ve made your choice.”

Me: “Any possibility of more fillings?”

Dentist: “No because the cavity has gotten into the nerves in the root so fillings wouldn’t work.”

And in case the above conversation makes my dentist come across as mean, he is definitely not. He is very understanding and he said the above kindly and quietly. We discussed the problem further. The upshot is that they don’t do root canals or surgery and I would have to see a specialist – which I should have known as I had to see a specialist in the early 1980s to remove an abscessed wisdom tooth. This one isn’t abscessed yet and I’m pouring on Oil of Cloves as necessary.

So, I have to see a specialist – an oral surgeon. One of the ones they reference is only one short bus ride from me and my dentist says the doctor is sympathetic to those using social services. I reminded him that I am not on social services, just have limited income. He said this dentist would still be sympathetic to my situation. We agreed early January for the surgery (pending getting an appointment for it. What do you want to bet that won’t be possible?). He gave me the specialist’s business info sheet and said I was to call him to book an appointment and then he would send them the x-ray he had just taken of the offending and offensive tooth. I thought the first part odd – don’t dentists do the calling to specialists and the booking? That is what happened in the 1980s. He also waived charging me for the x-ray and for my visit yesterday. “We were just chatting.” I could have afforded the low rate he was charging me for the x-ray but was still in shock about the necessary surgery.

Anyway I said I’d call the specialist’s office this week, thanked him and wished him a merry xmas.

So, supposing I get to this specialist in early January and the surgery goes well (big assumption and big presumption), there is still the problem of travel. Getting there by bus should be okay, but these specialists (as my dentist told me and as I remember from the 1980s) want you to have someone to drive you home afterwards because it is surgery and you do get drugged and get the freezing.

That might be a problem. Back in the 1980s, a first cousin once removed took me there and back (several trips because of the abscess) and I believe she even stayed over at my place in Aurora for a day or so afterwards. This cousin, whom I loved and was close to, died 12 years ago.

I am a senior on my own and while I do have friends, most of them don’t drive. Hey, it’s Toronto and we have public transit, such as it is (and don’t get me on that for this post). Two of my friends in Toronto, both near me geographically, do drive. Both have their own lives. One looks after a grandson once a week plus does other things on other days. The other one has her own health issues – knee problems requiring physical therapy twice a week. The third friend with a car lived next door – Tanya, the friend who died from cancer in February. I still miss her and not because she used to drive me occasionally to get heavy stuff – like garden soil).

So my choice of days to make an appointment is limited. I’m presuming because this oral surgeon is a specialist, there won’t be much choice and as there are others in the practice, he may not even work every day, although I thought I heard my dentist mention that they have Saturday hours. Good luck getting an appointment for then.

My son drives but has no car – he leases occasionally. I will see if he would be available. UPDATE. MY SON JUST EMAILED ME BACK AND HE WILL GET A CAR AND PICK ME UP AFTER MY DENTAL APPOINTMENT. FAMILY IS BEST.

Otherwise, I will take public transit home, no matter what state I’m in. Cabs are out of the question – not just for costs, but I will not be in any condition to call a cab afterwards and pre- booking won’t work as there is no guarantee about how long the surgery would take. I know this from personal experience – mine and others.

I may just have to lie and say a friend will come to pick me up and then afterwards “Oops, guess she couldn’t make it.” What are they going to do about it after the fact? Drive me home?

Even though I dread it and wish it wasn’t necessary, I will get the surgery done and in early January if I have any say in the matter. But as most things in life (mine, anyway), seeing is believing. That’s something I have learned from very hard experience.

Cheers.

Sharon

Only Child Writes

 

 

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Filed under Dental Surgery, Family and Friends, Health, Health Seniors, Help and Support, Life demands, Uncategorized

Only Child always living in survival mode

Only child ponders finances, health and the like

Only child ponders finances, health and the like

I am constantly living in survival mode and I’m fed up with it all. As I seem to get rid of one obstacle two more show up. So, here is more of my Why I Hate the World I Live In list. It is only partial, or we would be here until Easter.

1. The Federal Government has cut back on my Canada Pension Plan payments. They are saying I wasn’t making enough in my business to contribute enough, so from 2012 to now, they are cutting back each month. The cutback is only $1.00 and some odd cents a month and I’m not complaining about that. My beef is that they are deducting the whole difference for my May payment. That will cut into my meagre monthly food budget as I have nowhere else to cut. It’s the fault of these uncivil servants in the CPP department – they are supposed to be monitoring the situation but why every four years? I didn’t even know they could cut back and arbitrarily steal the money back. Not that it is much for me, but I am going to need every penny I can get (see points 2 and 3 below). I can dispute it and will do so formally but all they might do is spread out the amount they are taking back. And to call the CPP part of Service Canada, I had to go through my MP’s office and she connected me through the French line. Even she couldn’t get through even to wait in line for the next available person. At least the French guy spoke good English and gave me good information so I can proceed with my dispute, etc.

2. Problems with weather and animal-related (read “God” here) damage outside that will require repairs. Actually for the minor expense one, my handyman shares the blame with God’s windy weather. He didn’t put a new downspout extension in one spot or secure the old one enough, so it’s fallen off and I can’t get it or the new ones (yes, I did buy the new) on. He is waffling about when he can get here to fix it and no doubt take more money from me. The animal-God one. I will need new eavestroughs this spring because the middle of one on the far side of the house is bent out like a boat. So in heavy rainfalls (like we had last week and yes, some water did get in my basement from it) the water just p0urs off the side of the eavestrough there and onto the ground and seeps into my basement. The latter part is Nigel Applewaite’s fault for his faulty sealing job in 2011. But most of the blame is raccoons  on the roof and raccoons are nature, so from God. I talked to Mike about this last week. He was the one who found this problem late last fall when he was putting up the heating cables. Now I find out he doesn’t do eavestroughs and he says those who do usually don’t replace just the one side but do the whole thing. He said he would check with his colleagues on that. I told him to emphasize to them that I’m a senior living below the poverty level. My ex-husband would pay for half of this, and I might be able to manage half for one eavestrough side, except for No. 3 below.

3. One of my repeat editing clients needed me to edit her latest book. We agreed that because I was meeting a publisher’s submission deadline with my latest Beyond mystery book, that I would edit her book in March – as long as I finished by the end of March. I finished the Beyond book a few days early and when I emailed her about the edit, her reply was she had already had her book edited by someone else. At first I said I was glad that she got her book manuscript edited. Now, it’s a different story. I’m mulling over what I will do here besides keep trying to get more clients to start work with now. I have some for April on.

4. This one is a health issue. According to my optometrist I could lose the sight in one eye – because he didn’t tell me the whole story at the year before’s eye exam and didn’t follow up. All he told me back then was some pressure in the left eye and may need eye drops, so he wanted me to come back in soon. I decided to wait until I got my new glasses and got used to them. Then I got busy with other stuff and forgot. He should have had his receptionist or whatever her title is – phone to remind me a month or so later if it was so important. Would I have gone in then? Yes, if before late June last year when all the other health issues came at me, overlapping. End of this January when I went in for my annual check-up he chastised me for not making an appointment and included that I would have seen a specialist then. Excuse me. He never mentioned going to a specialist back then. I was too shocked and worried to give him hell for that, but I probed and probed about what it was all about and why couldn’t he prescribe the drops. Optometrists can do that. He didn’t give me an answer. So next Tuesday I’m off to the opthamalogist’s to get my death sentence.

Because if I lose any of my senses (and I have partial hearing loss in my left ear, but can manage so far with that), I’m ready to do a James Darren. Well, not Mr. Darren himself, but some of you may remember one of his first big hit in 1961, “Goodbye Cruel World.” Unlike him I won’t be joining any circus. Hey, I may not be able to see the tightrope, let alone the non-existent safety net in this world.

The odd thing here about my sight is the actual vision is exactly the same as last year when I had to get new glasses. So, my glasses have helped here.

Cheers.

Sharon

Only Child Writes

 

 

 

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Filed under Eavestroughs and dowspouts, finances, God, Health, Health Seniors, Life demands, Only child, Opticians and Optometrists, Poverty, Vision

Only Child celebrates birthday

Birthday_birthday_cake_3Today is my birthday. Didn’t the Beatles have a song that started out something like that? Which would be appropriate as I was and still am a Beatles fan. And yes I went to a couple of their concerts at the old Maple Leaf Gardens in Toronto and screamed my throat out – back in the mid 1960s.

Some people reflect on their year and what is ahead at the end of each year. I do some of that, but the annual birthday may be just as appropriate, if only for the “I’m getting older” factor. Birthdays are a reminder of that. When you are a senior, like me it is very mixed.

Yes, I would like to be  around 10 to 15 years later – if I could have my so-called wisdom and experience and my son would be the same age as he is now.  And be in good health and afford to live.

First the bad side of getting old and I will paraphrase my neighbour from down the street (also a senior). When I mentioned that I had been experiencing a lot of health issues the past five months, she said that this time in your life it is supposed to be when we can retire and enjoy life. She said it as if she didn’t believe it anymore.

She is right. Life in the senior lane can be awful. The body fails; the mind fails and for some people it can be very lonely. Add in living in poverty, despite all those glowing retirement ads and stories. Not all of us are rolling in money. Some (myself included) live below what Statistics Canada states is the upper level for singles (all ages) living alone.

Heck, last year when I had that dreadful boarder living here (I finally kicked her out and am glad I did), my net income was lower than the year before when she was living here only five months, not 10. Turns out she drained my electricity and water and that upped those bills.

And utility bills, with or without boarders, are high. So are property taxes and not just for seniors. Many of us live on a budget and certain things (like extra health coverage for health areas not covered by government health plans). Many of us don’t have access (via our or spouses’ retirement plans) to extra health plans, so we do without. We may have to choose one extra area to focus on. Eventually the others will fail us in old age.

And more things happen. So far my memory and forgetfulness haven’t worsened – I don’t think. On days when I have too much going on, too much bad being shoved my way to deal with, I wonder about that. That’s why I’m continually trying to prune what I do and also get rid of the clutter still left in my home. Right now I’m focusing on all the excess paper in my home office. The laundry room and storage there is next – but a lot of that is garden stuff dumped inside now that garden season is about over. I say about as there are still a few more things to do out in the garden and the weather might just be co-operating this coming weekend.

So, what do I give thanks for on my birthday? What do I still like in my life?

My outside garden obviously. In winter I try to compensate with lots of plants inside, but it’s not the same – so I do plan for next year’s garden.

My writing – particularly my Beyond mystery series and personal essays. And promoting my books. And something new I just started and enjoy – doing short skits as public presentations where I dress up as my main Beyond Blood character Dana Bowman.

Teaching writing workshops/running my East End Writers’ Group and helping and connecting with other writers.

Reading (and yes, print mainly although I do have an e-reader), walking, watching favourite TV programs and movies on TV. I’m old-fashioned enough to want to watch TV on a TV, not a computer, although I do watch short videos about the weather, gardening, health, writing and the like on the computer, also like cooking, and dining out with family and friends, going to street festivals, going into unique shops with crafts and the like (mainly “window shopping). And living in this house which I love (despite all the things that need fixing).

What do I want to do in the future?

Continue collecting info on my late father’s ancestry and reconnecting with cousins on Dad’s side of the family (particularly another one doing some genealogy research in that area), travel more – but not by plane. I don’t like all the excess security for those of us who are not security risks. I think my ex put it best when he said something about removing shoes was what got to him. But he and his current wife do still travel. Me, I want to travel more by train to Quebec province (where my dad was born), the train trip out west to BC through the mountains, and to my cousins’ in a medium-sized town in Michigan. One cousin has offered to pick me up at Windsor or Sarnia and I’m hoping to take him up on that later next year.

And more money to come in to pay for extras including house problems and travel.

I also wish for my health not to get any worse.

To tag on to the above two -house and health. If the latter gets too bad I don’t want to hang around. And I don’t want to go into a nursing home or even a retirement home. My next stop, I say, is the urn.

If I have 10 to 15 more good years (see above for what I consider good/not good), that will be fine. Living to an old age for most people isn’t worth it if you are sick in mind and/or body and are just wasting away.

Cheers.

Sharon

Only Child Writes

 

 

2 Comments

Filed under Family and Friends, Gardening, Genealogy, Health, Health Seniors, Home and Garden, Old Age, Only child, Poverty, Reading, School reunions, Seniors and Happiness, Seniors Hobbies and Interests