Monthly Archives: December 2015

Only Child in scary storm watch

Winter storms now constant worry

Winter storms now constant worry

I’m doing this week’s post early (but setting it to go live the usual late Tuesday morning). Why? We’re in winter storm watch in southern, southwestern and southeastern Ontario from suppertime. Depending on where you live it could include snow mixed with ice pellets, freezing rain and then transitioning early morning to just rain for light rain Tuesday. High easterly winds coming with all this until 11 a.m. or so on Tuesday. Maybe power outages but hopefully not.

This week’s post was supposed to be my year-end tally of the good and bad that have happened in my corner of the world. That will have to wait until next week’s post. If I posted this week the bad would outnumber the good by a lot. May still outnumber the good, but maybe not so much as this week. Who knows? We live in a scary horrible world where no place is safe – and I don’t mean only the weather

One of my close friends is very sick with cancer. She was rushed to the hospital yesterday. Her son isn’t well either, so her husband is doing everything. For privacy’s sake I’m not naming them or giving any more details. Just saying they are among the friends who have helped me a lot and I am trying to help them where possible.

I am also trying to reach my son and his girlfriend. They were here Christmas Day and evening and we had a lovely visit, chatting and eating Christmas dinner. They brought the cooked ham (I’m allergic to turkey) and Martin did a few quick odd jobs around the house. Martin and Juni (who is a graphic designer) designed the background colours for my new website in the works. I’m working on content, but the three of us sat at my desktop computer (with Martin doing actual computer stuff) to sort out content layout and even content and where it should go.

Boxing Day early morning they left early for the Ottawa Valley area in eastern Ontario. Yesterday that area got hit with hours of freezing rain. I have emailed but no response so don’t know what their situation is. They are staying at the home of Juni’s aunt and uncle. I’m going to try phoning my son’s cell but who knows if there is cell reception there or what.

The three of us did talk about the impending storm for the Greater Toronto Area and beyond coming today and they thought they might wait to leave to come home until Tuesday. But more storm is coming their way then. I suggested we keep in contact by phone and email Monday and Tuesday because of this weather.

I hope they are all right.

Meantime, back on the home front, I’ve gone into emergency disaster mode – everything from batteries to non electric radios (I have an old Walkman, although it’s difficult to see what station you are on and the old ghetto blaster can be used with six C batteries – if you get them all in correctly). Have a land line with cords (can’t use the wireless landline extension during power outages) so hopefully the phone service doesn’t go. Don’t want power to go either. But have flashlights (and extra batteries), candles (but I’m leery about using them much for safety’s sake). Have done most of the emergency profile/info from the Ontario government page – to help me do what I need to do – as much of it as I can.

It is all a big worry.

Not safe anywhere in the world – England has floods in York area, southern and midwestern USA – tornadoes, twisters, rain, snow, floods.

Yuck.

Anyway, let’s hope 2016 is much better in all ways for everyone.

Cheers.

Sharon

Only Child Writes

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Filed under Anxiety, Extreme Weather, Family and Friends, Floods, Hydro power outage, Ice Storm Southern Ontario, Leaky Basements, Mixed Perceptation, Only child, Uncategorized, Weather, Winter Weather

Only Child welcomes green Christmas

tree01Southern Ontario is going to have a green Christmas and I’m looking forward to it. Sure, a bit of snow falling and staying on the ground would be nice for between Christmas and New Year’s Day – as long as it disappeared for good January 2.

We’ve been experiencing milder than normal weather this month with the exception of a few days here and there. But it does make it easier to get around for that last-minute Christmas shopping or visiting family and friends.

Back the in the day when I was a kid (1950s and 1960s – the grey ages) we always got snow for Christmas – sometimes it froze over and it was quite slippery getting around. One Christmas Eve, when I was in my teens, Mom and I decided to go to the midnight Mass instead of doing the church thing on Christmas day. That was when I still believed in religion and all that stuff. I know it was when I was a teenager because it was just after Dad died, and I had just turned 17 earlier in December.

It was a cold dark night – no precipitation (you can tell I follow The Weather Network) but the snow had iced over. Mom and I hung onto each other as we walked to and from church.

Fast forward to Christmas 2015 – it is forecast to be sunny and a bit above normal. Christmas Eve will be much warmer and sunny with chance of isolated showers. Hopefully those showers will stay away so everyone can enjoy Christmas Eve. It’s going to rain on Boxing Day.

I used to chase around to sales on Boxing Day, especially when I lived in Aurora. One Boxing Day I did the sale thing with my son, Martin and his friend, also named Martin. The boys were in their teens and played in a band, so were knowledgeable about electronic products. I needed a new stereo set and they were along to help pick one out. And help me carry it home.

This year I would like to stay in Boxing Day and read and eat Christmas leftovers. Martin and Juni are coming for Christmas dinner on Christmas Day and bringing a ham. So we will spend Christmas together, exchanging presents and catching up.

Remember the true spirit of Christmas is not what’s in the bottle or boxes. To me it is spending time with family and friends and savouring the season, including the Christmas scenery I have created in my house.

How do you plan to spend Christmas Day? And Boxing Day?

Happy holidays to all for whatever you are celebrating.

Cheers.

Sharon

Only Child Writes

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Filed under 1950s, 1960s, Christmas holidays, Christmas spirit, Family, Family and Friends, Mom and Dad, Only child, Snow, Weather

Only Child on debunking the myth between sadness and illness

Only child ponders new findings on sadness and illness

Only child ponders new findings on sadness and illness

I am so fed up with people – medical or otherwise – telling people they are making themselves sick by being sad. Like we need another guilt trip to put ourselves through when we are sick? True, some lifestyle choices can make you sick (e.g. smoke and you may get lung cancer) and getting stressed out can make you more vulnerable to heart disease.

But being sad? Again true some life factors other than illness can make you sad. However, a recent UK study kills the myth that being sad makes you sick. Apparently the opposite is true. Makes sense. If you have a serious illness – terminal, chronic or even acute, are you really going to be jumping for joy? Are you really going to be positive with no negative feelings allowed? Get real if you think that. Maybe experiencing your sadness because you are sick is better for you and might help you to move on and come out the other side. I’m not saying get depressed or wallow in sadness. Talk to close friends. But these friends have to be the type that will listen, not judge, not tell you what to do.

The study was published in The Lancet online Dec. 9, 2015, and on  focused 1.3 million women (mean age 59 years) in the UK “to establish whether, after allowing for the poor health and lifestyle of people who are unhappy, any robust evidence remains that happiness or related subjective measures of wellbeing directly reduce mortality.”   After taking into account certain factors, the Study Findings were:

“Interpretation

In middle-aged women, poor health can cause unhappiness. After allowing for this association and adjusting for potential confounders, happiness and related measures of wellbeing do not appear to have any directt effect on mortality.”

So, those who tell us when we feel sad to pull up our socks, be positive and get out of the dumps, should maybe check out the research. If you are sick you don’t need to add a guilt trip. That won’t make you better and apparently being sad may not kill you.

Cheers.

Sharon

Only Child Writes

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Filed under Health, Health Seniors, UK Study of Women's Health and Sadness

Only Child finds a little joy in horrid world

Busy city street - sign of current times

Busy city street – sign of current times

Yesterday a friend and I were talking about the world today, the world we live in. We both agreed that is is a horrid world – too digital, too hurried, extreme weather, the terrorism, etc. I said it all got going into this state when we entered the new millennium and she agreed, with the addition that back in the 70s there was the Vietnam War. I added that back then there wasn’t so much of everything.

I don’t think it is because we are both seniors (albeit at the lower end of the seniors age bracket).

Truth is we are inundated with too much crappy stuff these days.

It is hard to find a little peace, a little joy. But we need to. The only other option seems to be to “get the hell out of Dodge.”

Last night while hurrying along a Toronto street to do some grocery shopping, I realized – hey, the weather in Toronto is warmer than usual for this time of year. No actual winter weather. True we’ve been getting a lot of fog and clouds and rain is coming later this week. I think something my ex said in an email earlier yesterday also was somewhere in my mind. He and his wife live out west and while they are getting a lot of rain he likes it because it is warmer then.

So, I did a momentary mind pause, slowed down my walking, and stopped cursing the Food Basics store for having one cooked ham on sale left (and it was awful looking – too much fat and a small string curled up in it – you know the “ick” factor).

I actually started to enjoy the evening, thinking it wasn’t bad weather-wise, still warmish.

How do you find a little peace and joy in your life?

Cheers.

Sharon

Only Child Writes

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Filed under Carpe Diem, Cities, Extreme Weather, Family and Friends, Friends, Happiness, Seniors, Sign of the Times, Winter Weather

Only Child celebrates birthday

Birthday_birthday_cake_3Today is my birthday. Didn’t the Beatles have a song that started out something like that? Which would be appropriate as I was and still am a Beatles fan. And yes I went to a couple of their concerts at the old Maple Leaf Gardens in Toronto and screamed my throat out – back in the mid 1960s.

Some people reflect on their year and what is ahead at the end of each year. I do some of that, but the annual birthday may be just as appropriate, if only for the “I’m getting older” factor. Birthdays are a reminder of that. When you are a senior, like me it is very mixed.

Yes, I would like to be  around 10 to 15 years later – if I could have my so-called wisdom and experience and my son would be the same age as he is now.  And be in good health and afford to live.

First the bad side of getting old and I will paraphrase my neighbour from down the street (also a senior). When I mentioned that I had been experiencing a lot of health issues the past five months, she said that this time in your life it is supposed to be when we can retire and enjoy life. She said it as if she didn’t believe it anymore.

She is right. Life in the senior lane can be awful. The body fails; the mind fails and for some people it can be very lonely. Add in living in poverty, despite all those glowing retirement ads and stories. Not all of us are rolling in money. Some (myself included) live below what Statistics Canada states is the upper level for singles (all ages) living alone.

Heck, last year when I had that dreadful boarder living here (I finally kicked her out and am glad I did), my net income was lower than the year before when she was living here only five months, not 10. Turns out she drained my electricity and water and that upped those bills.

And utility bills, with or without boarders, are high. So are property taxes and not just for seniors. Many of us live on a budget and certain things (like extra health coverage for health areas not covered by government health plans). Many of us don’t have access (via our or spouses’ retirement plans) to extra health plans, so we do without. We may have to choose one extra area to focus on. Eventually the others will fail us in old age.

And more things happen. So far my memory and forgetfulness haven’t worsened – I don’t think. On days when I have too much going on, too much bad being shoved my way to deal with, I wonder about that. That’s why I’m continually trying to prune what I do and also get rid of the clutter still left in my home. Right now I’m focusing on all the excess paper in my home office. The laundry room and storage there is next – but a lot of that is garden stuff dumped inside now that garden season is about over. I say about as there are still a few more things to do out in the garden and the weather might just be co-operating this coming weekend.

So, what do I give thanks for on my birthday? What do I still like in my life?

My outside garden obviously. In winter I try to compensate with lots of plants inside, but it’s not the same – so I do plan for next year’s garden.

My writing – particularly my Beyond mystery series and personal essays. And promoting my books. And something new I just started and enjoy – doing short skits as public presentations where I dress up as my main Beyond Blood character Dana Bowman.

Teaching writing workshops/running my East End Writers’ Group and helping and connecting with other writers.

Reading (and yes, print mainly although I do have an e-reader), walking, watching favourite TV programs and movies on TV. I’m old-fashioned enough to want to watch TV on a TV, not a computer, although I do watch short videos about the weather, gardening, health, writing and the like on the computer, also like cooking, and dining out with family and friends, going to street festivals, going into unique shops with crafts and the like (mainly “window shopping). And living in this house which I love (despite all the things that need fixing).

What do I want to do in the future?

Continue collecting info on my late father’s ancestry and reconnecting with cousins on Dad’s side of the family (particularly another one doing some genealogy research in that area), travel more – but not by plane. I don’t like all the excess security for those of us who are not security risks. I think my ex put it best when he said something about removing shoes was what got to him. But he and his current wife do still travel. Me, I want to travel more by train to Quebec province (where my dad was born), the train trip out west to BC through the mountains, and to my cousins’ in a medium-sized town in Michigan. One cousin has offered to pick me up at Windsor or Sarnia and I’m hoping to take him up on that later next year.

And more money to come in to pay for extras including house problems and travel.

I also wish for my health not to get any worse.

To tag on to the above two -house and health. If the latter gets too bad I don’t want to hang around. And I don’t want to go into a nursing home or even a retirement home. My next stop, I say, is the urn.

If I have 10 to 15 more good years (see above for what I consider good/not good), that will be fine. Living to an old age for most people isn’t worth it if you are sick in mind and/or body and are just wasting away.

Cheers.

Sharon

Only Child Writes

 

 

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Filed under Family and Friends, Gardening, Genealogy, Health, Health Seniors, Home and Garden, Old Age, Only child, Poverty, Reading, School reunions, Seniors and Happiness, Seniors Hobbies and Interests